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IT was the dark moment when our State of Origin hero broke down in tears on the side of a Sydney road.
An emotional Blues halfback Trent Hodkinson has opened up about the day he thought he was finished as a rugby league player.
Hodkinson had just left Brookvale Oval after a NSW Cup game playing for Canterbury in 2012 when he felt overcome.
He told his fiancee Chantelle to pull over on the way home to Cronulla and he burst into tears.
Hodkinson had hit rock bottom.
Trent Hodkinson playing NSW Cup for the Bulldogs. Source: News Limited
Long-term injuries and unwanted stints in modest NSW and Queensland Cups had taken a psychological toll.
Hodkinson didn't think he could make it back to first grade, let alone be the driving force behind a resurgent Blues side that delivered a success-starved state a first Origin series win in nine years.
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"I was driving home and speaking to the missus and I burst into tears," Hodkinson told The Daily Telegraph.
"She was driving, I was in the passenger seat. It wasn't fun.
"I just didn't think I had it anymore, really. Everything started rolling through my mind and whether I would have to go back to work.
"The injuries and then coming back through NSW Cup. My body was struggling and it hit me — would I ever be back to where I was?
"Will I ever be able to go out there again in first grade and compete?
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"It has been tough. I burst into tears at times and thought I would pretty much give the game away."
Hodkinson has fully recovered from serious shoulder and knee injuries which sidelined him for a total of 16 weeks.
Now he is a NSW hero after scoring the matchwinning try in Origin II. He has his own history which no-one can take away.
"It still doesn't feel real at the moment," Hodkinson said. "I wouldn't have thought this would have happened at the start of the year.
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"I was just looking to have a solid year for the Bulldogs and whatever came from that was a bonus.
"Luckily this came and I haven't looked back.
"I am enjoying my footy now. Life is good. Being injury-free helps and I have a good life away from footy.
"Everything is going all right, fingers crossed.
"We have won the series but we still have a very important game to go. We'd love to go out with a whitewash."
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